Friday, October 10, 2008

Meet The BYU Dick Sucking Team!!!

This is the first place that you are going to hear this news. BYU has formally announced it's first official dick sucking team! For years the team has operated in the private confines of the BYU Marriott Center but is now out in the open. This came about after news broke that 100% of the BYU football team was gay and has been sucking dicks for at least the last 70 years.

Now that dick sucking is an official sport of the BYU athletics program, the new coaching staff and school administrators are exited to get recruiting. The team currently consists of about 99% of the male student body which is roughly around 16,000 people. Females are not allowed on the team "because they aren't as good at sucking dick as us guys are." Said long time team member Austin Collie.

Now that this team is out in the open, the teammates are excited to compete.

"We are super duper excited to get out their and suck some dick" said team captain Max Hall. "Thats really all I've ever been good at so now is my chance to really show the world what I've got!"

Not many people are familiar with the DSL (Dick Sucking League) but that is all changing very quickly. There are no real rules and there is no real scoring system which confuses most traditional sports fans.

"Apparently the rules of competing are, you just go out there and suck as many dicks as possible." Said University of Utah coach Kyle Wittingham. "I don't really get it but hey, if they like sucking dicks then I guess this is the best thing for them."

Games are played every Tuesday, Friday and occasionally Saturdays. Because of the enormous size of the BYU team, only a select few will travel and compete. The rest will stay back and just suck each others dicks for practice. Unofficially, BYU has never lost a dick sucking competition.

Look forward to seeing a lot more BYU dick sucking in the near future. I don't think it's going away any time soon

here is a photo of one of the competing Brigham Young University dick sucking teams.